It most likely was a long path to get to
where you are, wasn’t it? Behind every successful marriage, are two
people who have done some tremendous things before deciding they’re
ready to take the next step. Have you considered a “must-do” list before
putting the ring on your finger? Maybe you should, as there are things
everyone needs to do before getting married.
1. Get your heart broken.
Sounds cliche, but true. Dealing with a
breakup teaches you about what went wrong in your relationship and how
you can prevent them from happening again.
2. Experiment With Online Dating.
You need to learn to take credit for all your strengths and general awesomeness right?
3. Learn From Your Relationship Mistakes.
Look back at your past? What part did
you play in the destruction of that relationship? Did you take them for
granted? Were you neglectful? Critical? These are all very important
things to ask yourself before moving on to a new relationship so you can
be a better version of you and not make the same mistake.
4. Fall in Love, More Than Once.
You need to find out what kind of
relationship or partner you want for the rest of your life, so get out
there and figure it out.
5. Come Up With a Definitive List of What You Won’t Compromise On in a Relationship.
These are normally called deal breakers.
You have values that your partner shouldn’t make you compromise just
like they have values that you shouldn’t ask them to compromise either.
Talk it out and see where each of you stand.
6. Learn to Trust Others.
Trust is one of the most important (if
not THE most important) thing to have in a relationship. If you don’t
trust your future partner, how will you create a solid marriage?
7. Learn Not to Make Being Married Your Sole Identity.
You need to be your own person and not to rely on someone else solely to define you
8. Spend Time Alone.
The more comfortable you are with yourself, the more likely you are to attract someone who will be comfortable with you.
9. Get to Know All the Facts.
You need to talk about all the boring
stuff, like financial matters and health before taking the leap into
marriage. Would you rather find out your partner is $30,000 in debt
before you got married, or after?
10. Live with someone that is not a member of your family.
Think of it as testing the waters before getting married. You want to know if you can live with your future spouse!
11. Spend some time on your career.
Again, cliche but true. You need to work on yourself before being able to fully commit in a relationship.
12. Spend time around kids.
This will help you decide whether or not
you want them and to let your partner know where you stand regarding
children before you tie the knot.
13. Figure out why you want to get married.
Do you genuinely love your partner? Or
do you just like the idea of getting married? Do you really want to
spend the rest of your life with them? Do you just want to wear a
wedding gown and have a big fancy party? Or do you think it’s just
something you now have to do because you’re getting older? Find out your
true intentions before making the leap.
14. Learn to fight fairly.
Disagreements will inevitably happen
with your future spouse. Learn to fight fairly now before you say
something you’ll regret after you’re married.
15. Learn to love people as they are.
Don’t expect people to change for you. Marrying your partner means you’ll accept for their strengths AND weaknesses.
16. Learn to DIY.
How can you nurture a marriage if you
cannot learn to take care of yourself first? Consider learning how to
cook or become the handyman around the house.
17. Meet your future spouse’s friends.
You might be able to pick up on red
flags that could hint at why you might not want to marry this person. Or
to confirm that your decision is completely spot on.
18. Meet your future spouse’s family.
You’re not just marrying your spouse,
you’re marrying into the family. Figure out if you can deal with their
family drama beforehand.
19. Get to know yourself.
A no-brainer here. If you don’t know who
you are and aren’t comfortable in your own skin, how could you possibly
know what type of person you want to spend the rest of your life with?
20. Learn to apologize sincerely.
We screw up from time to time. Admitting
it shows your partner that you’re mature and you’re willing to do what
it takes to make things right.