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http://i2.cdn.cnn.com/cnnnext/dam/assets/161004160648-01-sex-is-good-for-you-shutterstock-143175046-super-169.jpgS3X can be beautiful and wonderful. It’s supposed to be a fun and intimate rel ease. Not every time you have S3X is going to be mind blo wing, sacred or even ro mantic, but it can rock your world. Sometimes S3X is just S3X and there is no love involved, and that has its place too, but what it should never be is a chore, forced or one-sided for anyone. S3X is a two-person sport where toys and body parts are our tools of pleasure and everyone involved needs to want to be there. Still, even under the best of circumstances S3X can fall short of our expectations. For men, S3X is almost purely physical, and for women it is mostly mental; life’s cruel joke. We ladies just have to be in the right state of mind for S3X to be enjoyable. The only problem is that different states of mind warrant different types of S3X and some states of mind warrant no S3X at all.

Here is a list of mistakes that we’ve all made during S3X. Stop getting in your own way and go enjoy all that lovely S3X being offered to you. There is no wrong way to have S3X (well, unless it’s anally and hey guys, a little warning would be nice) but there are definitely some things that get in your head and cause you to not be able to relax and enjoy all of that lovely touching, kissing and fondling; physical intimacy.

. Overthinking it
When it comes to S3X, just do it and enjoy it. I mean seriously, if you think about anything too much it becomes a chore and S3X should never be a chore. If you are not enjoying it, you are not doing it right.

2. Worrying about how you look
Who cares? Think of it this way, when you are in the middle of making love are you looking at your partner thinking, dang, he sure makes weird faces when he 0rgas’ms or are you thinking damn, it sure feels good when we 0rgas’m? S3X should be something you are so involved in when it’s happening that you don’t have the time to waste worrying about what it all looks like on film, unless of course you’re a P0rn star.


3. Talking too much
A little talking is okay but when you are in the middle of S3X no one wants to hear you say, “Oh yeah, remind me tomorrow to buy toilet paper.” Also, I don’t need a play-by-play and I certainly don’t want to congratulate a man on every single move he makes and please, don’t call me a “dirty whore.” I am not one and even if I like to get a little nasty between the sheets for his pleasure, I don’t want to be called out for it. It’s not S3Xy and it’s a mood killer. Also, ladies, don’t call out the wrong name. No, guy wants to hear “Christian Grey” screamed out while he’s doing all the heavy lifting.

4. Not being fully present
Get into it. Enjoy it. S3X is supposed to be fun and pleasurable. You don’t need to be the best but a little enthusiasm goes a long way. Don’t tense up or start thinking about grocery lists and laundry. Give that man a little encouragement and sweet direction; he will happily satisfy your desires if you just ask for it. Men are not mind readers and expecting them to be is ridiculous.

5. Faking it
I don’t believe in faking 0rgas’ms. You cannot fake an 0rgas’m until you make it. If you fake it, you’ll never 0rgas’m because he will stop trying and let’s be honest; S3X without an 0rgas’m occasionally is fine but S3X without 0rgas’ms forever, what’s the point? I know we don’t always have an hour or more to get juices flowing with massage oils and scented candles, not with kids and all, and that is what quickies are made for. Believe me in the right state of mind even a quickie can be satisfying but I refuse to fake an 0rgas’m and you should too.
Believe me, I know men make mistakes too. Hello, tuning in Tokyo is not my idea of foreplay, and pssst… most women do not 0rgas’m from penetration alone. Also, whoever told men that any woman ever found having their head pushed into a lap even remotely attractive lied. But if you are willing and present, S3X can be magical and mind blowing and I swear, once I saw a unicorn fly across the room after 0rgas’ming. So, ladies and gentlemen, go get your groove on just keep in mind that there are usually at least two people involved and it should be fun for everyone.
What’s the one thing that always turns you on?




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