Do you really want to enjoy your spouse now while there is youth
and good health? Here are simple ways that will see you through the
later years.
1. Show affection both publicly and privately
Learn how to hold your spouse’s hand when you are walking down the
street. Wink at her in a crowded restaurant where she is already sitting
and waiting for you to join her on a Friday after work. Give her a full
brilliant smile; a hug at the very least feels like a no-brainer but
these little things help her remember why you married her even after 20
years of marriage. But we’re so caught up in day-to-day stuff—cooking
dinner, checking email, helping with homework, finishing up that letter
for our boss—that a loving gesture is usually the first thing to go in
our relationships.
“Stop whatever it is you’re doing and acknowledge each other when you first meet after a long day,” says Andrea Syrtash, author of Cheat on Your Husband (with Your Husband).
“It sets the tone for a better, more connected evening. It
could be for just five seconds, but you send the message that your
partner is a priority in your life and that you’re going to acknowledge
it.”
You see, when you do not exhibit these
physical acts of love and the personal connection it creates, you risk
becoming roommates rather than lovers.
2. Using words like hot, exciting, thrilling about our relationships remind us of how we got together in the first place.
When was the last time you used such words to describe your relationship? “Once you move out of the infatuation phase, the spice usually starts to fade,” says author and s*x therapist, Dr. Ian Kerner.
Many women that I have talked to confess that there is no spark in
their relationship and that it feels so lukewarm. So what can you do to
bring back that strong, intense connection? Continue reading for other
hot and sizzling tips to reignite the fire in your relationship.
3. Re-arrange your bedroom
This might sound absurd but guess what; it’s the place where you
spend time alone with your partner, but there may be roadblocks to
seduction. Put a lock on the door so that the kids do not walk in
freely. Get rid of the family pictures on the dresser. Sexologist and
relationship expert Logan Levkoff explains that seeing a picture of your
children or mother-in-law could definitely ruin the moment—or prevent
you from getting in the mood in the first place.
Position your bed so that the sunlight streams in first thing in
the morning. Once the sun peaks out, you tend to stretch seductively
towards your partner in preparation for waking up.
At the same time, you tickle his toes and he finds a way to stretch
towards you. Early morning cuddling is an aphrodisiac for what lies
ahead. Consider removing the television from the bedroom; make it your
place of fun; s*x and sleep only. The television gives you an excuse to
postpone the intimacy because you say, ‘honey, I have to watch that show or that breaking news.’ What happens is that you end up losing the moment.
4. Write a love note and stick it on the refrigerator
In these modern times, handwritten love letters may be a thing of
the past, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t express your love via
written communication. Sometimes it’s easier than saying it aloud. “Make it a priority to send a sweet email, sexy text message or some other little gesture on a weekly basis,” says Dr. Yvonne Fulbright, a sexologist and author.
Written words are powerful. When he goes downstairs for his morning coffee and finds that note that says, “Good morning Fred, don’t forget our date tonight, looking forward to—-, I love you”, you
definitely will rock his world that day and he will whistle all day
from the shower to the office, bad traffic and all day at work.
5. Boldly tell him what you want
You can’t be upset that your husband never gives you a massage or goes down on you if you don’t tell him you want one. “A reason men don’t do things is because they fear getting it wrong,” says Logan. “Women have to understand that men feel pressured.” Make it easier by sharing with your significant other the things you like and dislike.
This is so true. Men love approval, they are so afraid of being
criticized that rather than not being sure, they will hold back. Your
spouse wants to try out what he saw on television, or what the guys
discussed but he wants to be sure that you don’t accuse him of “learning it somewhere else” so,
he will shut down and just be mechanical. He might even go as far as
finding a willing partner if you will not encourage new ideas in your
bedroom.
Your spouse wants to learn all there is about you. Boldly tell him
how to please you, you don’t have to be shy. Be totally open and honest
with him and allow him to be open as well.
Enjoy your spouse now while there is youth and good health. These things will see you through the later years.
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